this is for matt, cuz ur always asking me y i dont write bloggies anymore
yupp thats it
-this_blue_october
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Random Thoughts (BlOgGiE nUmBeR 10)
All brave men love; for he only is brave who has affections to fight for, whether in the daily battle of life, or in physical contests. - Nathaniel Hawthorne
mood: happy =]
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mwhahaha random thoughts in my head today!
- new celly!!!!!! =] *smiles all around for the fabu new fone* soooooooooo happy! finally got a celly that can take pictures again. i missed that soo much
- new texting plan??? my mom got me a new little thing which i appreciate but i'm hoping she'll let me crank it up to the higher one. we'll see
- foreign exchange students: why havent i seen any so far??? usually there r a bunch at r school and at least a couple of them r really hott italian guys. no sign of them yet
- i hate my geometry class...nuff said
- we doing weight room for gym now. blehhh. my plan is to stick to the treadmills, olypticals, any thing that helps my abs, and anything tht works my thighs. i really dont care if my arms, shoulders, and all those other muscles with fancy names r'nt toned. i dont even no where half ot those muscles r. it toook me forever to find out where my glutes were...
- miss my best friend. we used to be so close but we dont hang out or talk as much. i guess we kinda ran outta things to say. sucks tho
- slammed my thumb in a car door while back. the nail is naaaaasty right now. i swear i can scare away little kids by holding my thumb in they're face. not that im doing that lol
- booooooooored, ima leave u peoples now
adiosss
-this_blue_october
mood: happy =]
-----------------------------------------------------------------
mwhahaha random thoughts in my head today!
- new celly!!!!!! =] *smiles all around for the fabu new fone* soooooooooo happy! finally got a celly that can take pictures again. i missed that soo much
- new texting plan??? my mom got me a new little thing which i appreciate but i'm hoping she'll let me crank it up to the higher one. we'll see
- foreign exchange students: why havent i seen any so far??? usually there r a bunch at r school and at least a couple of them r really hott italian guys. no sign of them yet
- i hate my geometry class...nuff said
- we doing weight room for gym now. blehhh. my plan is to stick to the treadmills, olypticals, any thing that helps my abs, and anything tht works my thighs. i really dont care if my arms, shoulders, and all those other muscles with fancy names r'nt toned. i dont even no where half ot those muscles r. it toook me forever to find out where my glutes were...
- miss my best friend. we used to be so close but we dont hang out or talk as much. i guess we kinda ran outta things to say. sucks tho
- slammed my thumb in a car door while back. the nail is naaaaasty right now. i swear i can scare away little kids by holding my thumb in they're face. not that im doing that lol
- booooooooored, ima leave u peoples now
adiosss
-this_blue_october
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
The Exciting Events of my Life (Bloggie numero 9)
The trees reflected in the river -- they are unconscious of a spiritual world so near to them. So are we. - Nathaniel Hawthorne
mood: dorky =P
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yes today i am writing about the exciting events of my life...this should be interesting lol. more like me just writing my random thoughts. so here goes:
4:07 pm: i have this really old song stuck in my head. i have been walking around school humming it all week. everyday my friend who sits next to me in bio turns to me and he's like "really??? really?? ur singing it again??? do u hate me or something??" poor kid lol, i'ma keep singing it. =P bathroom break, brb
4:18 pm: no i wasnt in the bathroom the whole time. so i just bought the song, mwhahaha >=]. poor william lol. i am listening to it right now and singing along loudly and sort of off key. it is Wouldn't it Be Nice by the Beach Boys. i have no idea y i like this song, but i do. this was in the movie 50 First Dates. i loooooooooove this movie so much. It is def one of my favs if not my top fav. its really sweet and sad, i still remember staying up really late with my friend danny at her house watching this. i was staying at her house for a couple days and were having a movie marathon, then followed by a video game marathon. it was like the day i came home and i'm like....mom, i am buying 50 first dates.
i still remember that most recent time i stayed at danny's. it was the best. i remember me and d had plans to go bowling the next day and we were up really late like watching tv and talking. we had yearbooks out and everything, and the house phone rings. and the caller id had the last name of one of the kids we were going bowling with 2marrow. and me and d look at each other like...is that him? nahh, and we went back to the show. every time it rang we'd like look at each other. then d's mom answers the phone and we look at each other again like... omg it is him!!!nahhh it cant be him. then danny's mom yells up the stairs that the phones for her and we're like oh crap!!!! it was almost midnight when he called. and of course adam and justin, the kids we were going bowling with, practically yelled at d's mom when she answered the phone cuz they thought it was her cell phone... -_-
somehow we got to go anyway. omg bowling was the best. it was me, d, jill, adam, and justin. it was awesome. we acted like retards the whole time. hah and my fav part, i went into bowling with 20 bucks, and came out with 21 dollars, a coke, and a bag of peanut M 'n m's, tell me how that worked lol.
every night i stayed with d after that we had a routine. we'd stay up late playing old Mario Party games on her gamecube and talking to adam on the phone. we had like this code so if someones parents were coming by we could pretend we were asleep and the other people would no not to say anything. i think our code was "the eagle flies at midnight"...adam's idea lol.
me and d, we r truly awesome lol. we had some awesome times. = )
4:37 pm: still listening to the beach boy's song, ima have these words memorized lol
all for now! prob be back latersss....
try not to miss me ;]
-this_blue_october
mood: dorky =P
----------------------------------------------------------------------
yes today i am writing about the exciting events of my life...this should be interesting lol. more like me just writing my random thoughts. so here goes:
4:07 pm: i have this really old song stuck in my head. i have been walking around school humming it all week. everyday my friend who sits next to me in bio turns to me and he's like "really??? really?? ur singing it again??? do u hate me or something??" poor kid lol, i'ma keep singing it. =P bathroom break, brb
4:18 pm: no i wasnt in the bathroom the whole time. so i just bought the song, mwhahaha >=]. poor william lol. i am listening to it right now and singing along loudly and sort of off key. it is Wouldn't it Be Nice by the Beach Boys. i have no idea y i like this song, but i do. this was in the movie 50 First Dates. i loooooooooove this movie so much. It is def one of my favs if not my top fav. its really sweet and sad, i still remember staying up really late with my friend danny at her house watching this. i was staying at her house for a couple days and were having a movie marathon, then followed by a video game marathon. it was like the day i came home and i'm like....mom, i am buying 50 first dates.
i still remember that most recent time i stayed at danny's. it was the best. i remember me and d had plans to go bowling the next day and we were up really late like watching tv and talking. we had yearbooks out and everything, and the house phone rings. and the caller id had the last name of one of the kids we were going bowling with 2marrow. and me and d look at each other like...is that him? nahh, and we went back to the show. every time it rang we'd like look at each other. then d's mom answers the phone and we look at each other again like... omg it is him!!!nahhh it cant be him. then danny's mom yells up the stairs that the phones for her and we're like oh crap!!!! it was almost midnight when he called. and of course adam and justin, the kids we were going bowling with, practically yelled at d's mom when she answered the phone cuz they thought it was her cell phone... -_-
somehow we got to go anyway. omg bowling was the best. it was me, d, jill, adam, and justin. it was awesome. we acted like retards the whole time. hah and my fav part, i went into bowling with 20 bucks, and came out with 21 dollars, a coke, and a bag of peanut M 'n m's, tell me how that worked lol.
every night i stayed with d after that we had a routine. we'd stay up late playing old Mario Party games on her gamecube and talking to adam on the phone. we had like this code so if someones parents were coming by we could pretend we were asleep and the other people would no not to say anything. i think our code was "the eagle flies at midnight"...adam's idea lol.
me and d, we r truly awesome lol. we had some awesome times. = )
4:37 pm: still listening to the beach boy's song, ima have these words memorized lol
all for now! prob be back latersss....
try not to miss me ;]
-this_blue_october
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Chaos Theory (Bloggie #8)
It is to the credit of human nature, that, except where its selfishness is brought into play, it loves more readily than it hates. Hatred, by a gradual and quiet process, will even be transformed to love, unless the change be impeded by a continually new irritation of the original feeling of hostility. - Nathaniel Hawthorne, excerpt from The Scarlet Letter
mood: hungry
--------------------------------------------------------
In my literacy class the teacher makes us read these magazines called Teen Ink. She makes us flip through them, read an article, and write a response to it. so i'm looking thru and i find this poem called Chaos Theory. its beautiful. so i copied it down to save it. and now i am sharing it with you. i did not write this altho i wish i could write this well:
Chaos Theory
Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
SoI tell her I believe in people.
Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans
down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.
In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy butI know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.
In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs
…
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.
Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings…
Carolyn said she believed in angels.
- By Debbie G., Arlington Heights, IL
Amazing, leaves you thinking. All for now
Laters,
this_blue_october
mood: hungry
--------------------------------------------------------
In my literacy class the teacher makes us read these magazines called Teen Ink. She makes us flip through them, read an article, and write a response to it. so i'm looking thru and i find this poem called Chaos Theory. its beautiful. so i copied it down to save it. and now i am sharing it with you. i did not write this altho i wish i could write this well:
Chaos Theory
Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
SoI tell her I believe in people.
Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans
down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.
In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy butI know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.
In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs
…
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.
Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings…
Carolyn said she believed in angels.
- By Debbie G., Arlington Heights, IL
Amazing, leaves you thinking. All for now
Laters,
this_blue_october
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
My Dad (bloggie # 7)
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. - I Corinthians 13:4-8
mood: hopeful
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
hiii. umm today i'm writing about what's going on in my life. you'll see what i mean:
So it's October 9th. And the phone rings at 10:30. The caller id shows its my uncle and i answer. but he seems colder than he usually is with me. "i need to tlak to your father" "um hes asleep right now" theres a pause. "well ur going to need to wake him up for this". i run to my parents room and open the door. my mom looks at me with tired, angry eyes. "what's going on?" "it's uncle carl, for dad". my mom understands instantly and grabs the phone while she wakes up my dad. i leave as fast as possible so i wont have to hear anymore. but i already no wat happened. grandpa's dead....And this is when it all begins.
My grandpa died of cancer in his pancreas. We had known about it adn knew that it was very likely gonig to get the best of him. But we didnt realize it would happen so fast. Everyone was hurting for a while. My dad was most upset and i was constantly beating myself up inside for never getting to say goodbye or getting to tell him i loved him one last time. I was always playing scenes over again in my head from the funeral. and my grandma's house jsut felt empty and wrong. it didnt seem like he could actually be gone forever.
The day we got back from his funeral my dad was sick. We didnt know what it was but we knew something was wrong. The scariest part was when my dad got one of the symptoms my grandpa had. When my grandpa was still alive his skin had started to turn very yellow. This was because bile wasnt leaving his body properly. So it built up and made him yellow. My dad started to look like this. We were scared as hell. There was one night where my parents didnt know i was down stairs. I could hear them talking in the next room over. and my dad says to my mom "i dont like this. i feel like i'm going through what i jsut watched my father go through" I could hear his voice shake as he said it. i cried. i was not doing to lose my dad to this too. it was just not going to happen. i was convinced that it had to be soemthing else.
So for a while things seemed to get better. My dad felt a little better and we were never given bad news. So everyone kind of relaxed a little.
One day my mom calls my brother down from upstairs. And she tells me i have to get off the computer now. so i do. me and my bro sit in the living room with my dad and my mom sits down. silence. Now i'm scared, we've never had a family meeting before.
so my mom starts. she tells us that dad had been going to the doctors a lot lately. and they finally got the results. she says that the reason by dad had gotten so yellow was because his pancreas was pushing on watever it is that holds bile. and his pancreas was doing this because it had a growth in it. which was in the doctors minds, most definately cancer. my stomach drops. my brother and i look quickly over at my dad and then look away. My mom tells us that my dad is much younger than my grandpa was so he has a much better chance of beating it. she says hes going to fight it as best he can adn that hes gonna take chemo to help it go away. my mom stops in the middle of her next sentence and starts crying. and before i know it i'm bawling too. my dad finishes for her. he says hes not going down without a fight and he does not intend to lose it either. and he tells us that just in case, we're the best things hes ever done. Cue the next set of tears. i look up at my dad and hes crying. i could feel my heart being torn out of my chest. i had never seen my dad cry b4. it hurt. i look over at my brother who looks extremely upset but is the most composed out of all of us. my mom asks him if he wants a hug and when he says yes, another new set of tears. my dad hugs me to him and i cry into his shirt. we jsut stay like this for what feels like the longest time.
and this is only the beginning...
all for now, eyes hurt from crying
- this_blue_october
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. - I Corinthians 13:4-8
mood: hopeful
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
hiii. umm today i'm writing about what's going on in my life. you'll see what i mean:
So it's October 9th. And the phone rings at 10:30. The caller id shows its my uncle and i answer. but he seems colder than he usually is with me. "i need to tlak to your father" "um hes asleep right now" theres a pause. "well ur going to need to wake him up for this". i run to my parents room and open the door. my mom looks at me with tired, angry eyes. "what's going on?" "it's uncle carl, for dad". my mom understands instantly and grabs the phone while she wakes up my dad. i leave as fast as possible so i wont have to hear anymore. but i already no wat happened. grandpa's dead....And this is when it all begins.
My grandpa died of cancer in his pancreas. We had known about it adn knew that it was very likely gonig to get the best of him. But we didnt realize it would happen so fast. Everyone was hurting for a while. My dad was most upset and i was constantly beating myself up inside for never getting to say goodbye or getting to tell him i loved him one last time. I was always playing scenes over again in my head from the funeral. and my grandma's house jsut felt empty and wrong. it didnt seem like he could actually be gone forever.
The day we got back from his funeral my dad was sick. We didnt know what it was but we knew something was wrong. The scariest part was when my dad got one of the symptoms my grandpa had. When my grandpa was still alive his skin had started to turn very yellow. This was because bile wasnt leaving his body properly. So it built up and made him yellow. My dad started to look like this. We were scared as hell. There was one night where my parents didnt know i was down stairs. I could hear them talking in the next room over. and my dad says to my mom "i dont like this. i feel like i'm going through what i jsut watched my father go through" I could hear his voice shake as he said it. i cried. i was not doing to lose my dad to this too. it was just not going to happen. i was convinced that it had to be soemthing else.
So for a while things seemed to get better. My dad felt a little better and we were never given bad news. So everyone kind of relaxed a little.
One day my mom calls my brother down from upstairs. And she tells me i have to get off the computer now. so i do. me and my bro sit in the living room with my dad and my mom sits down. silence. Now i'm scared, we've never had a family meeting before.
so my mom starts. she tells us that dad had been going to the doctors a lot lately. and they finally got the results. she says that the reason by dad had gotten so yellow was because his pancreas was pushing on watever it is that holds bile. and his pancreas was doing this because it had a growth in it. which was in the doctors minds, most definately cancer. my stomach drops. my brother and i look quickly over at my dad and then look away. My mom tells us that my dad is much younger than my grandpa was so he has a much better chance of beating it. she says hes going to fight it as best he can adn that hes gonna take chemo to help it go away. my mom stops in the middle of her next sentence and starts crying. and before i know it i'm bawling too. my dad finishes for her. he says hes not going down without a fight and he does not intend to lose it either. and he tells us that just in case, we're the best things hes ever done. Cue the next set of tears. i look up at my dad and hes crying. i could feel my heart being torn out of my chest. i had never seen my dad cry b4. it hurt. i look over at my brother who looks extremely upset but is the most composed out of all of us. my mom asks him if he wants a hug and when he says yes, another new set of tears. my dad hugs me to him and i cry into his shirt. we jsut stay like this for what feels like the longest time.
and this is only the beginning...
all for now, eyes hurt from crying
- this_blue_october
Thursday, January 22, 2009
About Him (Bloggie # uhhh 6??)
" That Love is all there is, Is all we know of Love." - Emily Dickinson
mood: tired
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So "ryan" got suspended from school. Five days. just greaat lol. hes got 3 down, and they decided to cut him some slack so only 1 left. i miss him tho. havent seen him in a week. never woulda guessed i'd miss him so much. i cant wait for him to come back and to be able to see him again.
so yeshhh the other day i'm talking to him on the phone and he asks me if i ever talk to my friends about him. so i say yeah and he asks me what i say about him. and me beign brain dead after 8 every night i couldnt remember much. soo i thought i'd right it down here. so here goes:
my friends ask me wat i like most about him. and of course i cant pick jsut one thing so here's my little list. its not really in a certain order:
- his smile
- he's so fun to be around
mood: tired
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
So "ryan" got suspended from school. Five days. just greaat lol. hes got 3 down, and they decided to cut him some slack so only 1 left. i miss him tho. havent seen him in a week. never woulda guessed i'd miss him so much. i cant wait for him to come back and to be able to see him again.
so yeshhh the other day i'm talking to him on the phone and he asks me if i ever talk to my friends about him. so i say yeah and he asks me what i say about him. and me beign brain dead after 8 every night i couldnt remember much. soo i thought i'd right it down here. so here goes:
my friends ask me wat i like most about him. and of course i cant pick jsut one thing so here's my little list. its not really in a certain order:
- his smile
- he's so fun to be around
- he's so honest
- he always makes time for me
- hes got the coolest personality
- he's not afraid to jsut be himself
- he knows what he wants outta life
- he makes me think about him all the time
- he listens to me talk about everything even when i know he doesnt really care about some of the things
- he's like the only person i know who can make me go from crying to laughing
- he's not afraid of PDA in front of his friends
- he puts up with me when i get really annoying =P
- whenever i'm with him i feel so comfy
- he loves to mess around with people
- hes like drop dead gorgeous
- i can ask him anything and he'll always tell me
- whenever he touches me its like magic
- he stays with me on the phone for hours even if we're both not talking
- the way his eyes light up when he smiles
- his voice
- he lets me tease him
- hes super patient with me
- i drive him crazy but he hasnt given up on me yet
- he knows he's hott but he doesnt flaunt it
- he makes my heart go a thousand miles an hour
- he knows who he really is
- whenever hes there he just makes everything better
- ....did i say gorgeous already?
- he helps me with a lot of problems that i have
aghhh i gotta go, but i'm not done. there will be moreee
all for now
-this_blue_october
Friday, January 16, 2009
Writing about him even though he's gonna read it (bloggie # 5)
"The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of." - Blaise Pascal
mood: relaxed
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
okie sooo, writing bout this moment me and "ryan" had. =] this was wednesday night
*flash back*
so it's me, him, and one of our friends. and we're at church and we're going out this back exit in this longish dark hallway. The only light coming in is from the two doors, one on each end of the hallway. so our friend walks out one of the doors and goes outside. so its jsut me and him in the hallway. and he goes "wait up i gotta put my jacket on" so he pulls his jacket on and looks at me and he goes "lets just stay here for a little while". my heart starts going a thousand miles an hour and i'm like "ok!"lol. so i'm looking out the door and he comes up behind me and hugs me. so i'm looking out the little window thingy in the door and hes like swaying me back and forth and we're trying to spot my mom's car. and after a little he lets go and stands in the corner. so i look over and hes smiling and i swear it was perfect, the way the light was hitting him from the window im like "dammnn this kid is gorgeous" in my head. he looked amazing. i keep thinknig bout the way he looked there. but anzways so i go over to him and he wraps his arms around me and i rest my head back on his chest. and we're just like this for a little. so he leans over and kisses my neck and my heart like jumps through my chest. right then i'm like so friggin happy lol. i'm freaking out in a good way and my heart's skipping beats. i wanted to stay like that forever. it was perfect, totally perfect.
it was the best, damn i am so lucky to have him. =]
all for todayy
-this_blue_october
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